Just Listening…

Have you ever sat and  listened to the birds sing & whistle, the wind blow, the rain fall, the leaves shake, and branches fall?

Have you ever wondered what song the birds sang, the rhythm of the wind, the chatter of the rain fall, the meaning of it all?

Have you ever thought that maybe the rocks really do cry out and praise God?

Have you ever insisted for natures music to just stop?

Have you ever thought to chime in and sing in the quiet parts, so that when it reaches the nostrils of God its as sweet as His favor?

Maybe none of this is making any sense at all, but I listened hard and experienced a windfall.

Before I knew it I had my hands lifted in praise.  I allowed the birds to sing and whistle my troubles away.  I allowed the wind to blow away my past, and the rain fall to cleanse my soul alas, the leaves to shake away the shame and disgrace, then branches fell and left me a money trail.

I was elated to find ten dollars underneath each fallen branch.  I counted out 30,000 then God spoke “I’ll triple that”.  I wondered how long I sat in the field of nothing but birds, trees, wind, money and pretty colors; then God spoke,

“You’re not amazed,  it’s heaven on earth for others.  With you it’s just a field but see beyond your eyes and be led by the spirit all the time! You will soon see the joy and peace of it all….

Now it’s time to awake and start your day.  Don’t allow the obstacles and stumbling blocks of  this day to deter you.  It’s only stepping-stones to get you to the promise I have just for YOU!”

Open your spiritual eyes and see what God is doing in your life.  It may look like just a field, or just a simple something with no real significance but if you look harder you will see the actual BIG picture.

Much Love,

Tracy B


Just a little talk with God

Each day I seek God on what to blog about.  I’ve never heard to blog on the latest gossip, or the hottest fashion hits and misses, who did and said what.  You would think if He wanted my success HE would have me blog about things that cater to the mind.  So I decided to ask me some questions to my Father God and get some answers.

“I want to reach people God. I want them to anticipate my next words like they anticipate the next episode of Basket Ball Wives.  I want to speak on things that are relevant and can change lives in a grand and FAITHFUL way.  I want to see people smiling and commenting about how something that was said sparked and changed their lives.  I just want to be a blessing God, is there anything wrong with that?  After all YOU were the one that told me to do this.  Surely I need your direction, but I need it to be just like my directions!!!” Then I paused and heard a hearty laugh;  I mean it was gust busting and knee slapping. I wanted to know what was so funny.  Then He answered me.

“Do you ever stop talking long enough to listen to what you are saying?  The only thing that made sense was you admitting you want to have all the control.  You want me to lead you but I have to follow your lead; sounds kinda right???  It doesn’t work that way.  You say you want to reach people and impact them but what can the latest gossip or fashion craze do besides change the outer appearance of my people?  You have to dig deeper, seek harder, knock with urgency, and praise Me with all your being.  I am Alpha and Omega, I know the start, the middle and the end of this thing.  Keep doing what I said for you to do and STOP with all the I’s.  This is NOT about you at all.  This is about my people.  You are not created in the image of mediocrity so don’t conform to it!  Do what I instruct and when I don’t speak do what you know.  I’ve given you the keys to each door. Start unlocking the mystery behind each one!!!! Now go on and be great because GREATNESS lives in you!”

I sat in awe again and pouted a little.  I knew what I just heard was the truth and once again leaving me without control. I dared not speak what I was thinking but HE knew it anyways; however I was not willing to utter the thought.

I’m saying all of this to say regardless of how bleak or little it may look continue to trust God in all of it.  Allow His plans for your life to flourish without you taking control.   I know all things are working for my good in HIS timing.

One day I was praying for the world to change and God said NO,,, “pray for your change and you will see a change in the world!!!”

God keep us all from dangers seen as well as unseen.  Help us to lose control to you ONLY and gain wisdom from it! Until we meet again. …..

Much Love,

Tracy B


It’s Make Over Time & I Look & Feel Great

Be a person of release! No more poverty mindset. For the poor shall be with us always, but you don’t have to be the poor.

I was reading the Essence Magazine article on Money Matters and was amazed at the mindset differences in how each person viewed money and saving it. The article was very informative and even challenged me to view how I see money.  Growing up it was preached that money was evil and rich folk would not enter heaven.  It’s of the devil and Jesus was poor. LOL- I’ve never known a poor person to have a treasurer (have you?) Somehow we overlooked that and began to think the more we struggled as Christians the closer we were to God. I use to think that way, but it was not because I was taught that. My mother taught me and my brothers the opposite, but I constantly heard it being preached.  And we all know the more you hear something the more you believe it.  Faith comes by hearing and so does fear!

I began to think  that my struggle was supposed to be my life story.  I was closer to God if I struggled more, if the pain was unbearable, if my world was crashing then God loved me.  That’s the craziest thing to think right? NOPE, not if that is what is being preached and you believe the preacher over God.  Folk still do that today!! I aint lying I know some-)

When you think like this, it spills over to other areas in your life.  Your spiritual life,  finances, physically and mental state are all suffering. You notice how frequent you stay in unhealthy relationships, friendships, banks/credit unions, and careers.  We think the struggle is what’s making God our friend. We close our hands to give but open them to receive freely.  Sounds backwards but it’s true.  When you’re struggling do you really have anything to give? Of course your hands are closed.

However, it is so important to have a relationship with God. I found out from listening to my mother that God does not desire that any of us be in lack.  As a matter of fact, HE wants us to live life in abundance.  He even has great plans and not curses for us.  He wants to give us everything that is good and perfect so that we lack nothing but it does come with requirements.  He requires you change your stinky thinking habits,read the bible for yourself, and have a relationship with Him.

Stop the nonsense of the struggle.  If God wanted you to struggle He would not have given you gifts and talents to make yourself rich.  If God wanted you to be in lack then HE would not say He will supply ALL your needs.  If God wanted you to struggle with anything then why would HE place us as dominion over everything?  If God wanted you to say in unhealthy relationship then why would HE design someone just for you? If God wanted you to be always be broken then HE would not promise to give you the desires of your heart.  But if you don’t have the one on one personal relationship with God then how can you know these things He desires for you?

Well if you’re reading this blog NOW you know and it’s up to you to change your  stinky thinking. God has so much in stored for His children.  Now I’m not saying it doesn’t require sacrifice, or struggle, but I am saying it later ends in triumph.  Not in heaven either, but right here on earth.  Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven You don’t have to wait until the by and by, golden gates and streets in the sky. You can have your heaven right here on this earth.  It’s all about your thinking.

Dare to change your mind on the negative and SPEAK your world into existence.

Today I choose to release the negative, the struggle, and the thoughts of old and focus solely on the promise and paradise of God!


Much Love,

Tracy B



Dumb Stuff People Do and Say (bonus)

I had to sneak in some extra blog time so that I can share with y’all some of the things that come across my mind.  Since this has been an Are You For Real Friday,’ I wanted to follow-up with the dumb stuff people do and say.  It had me laughing so hard while driving.  I replayed some of the dumb things folk have done and even  myself.  Thinking of these event I just couldn’t stop laughing.  Laughter is such good medicine for the spirit/soul and Lord knows I could use some.  After having a great laugh I thought I’d extend the laughter medication to you.

Now this medicine comes with a warning and side effects.  I have listed some for your review:

ADDICTING, can cause cramps,  shortness of breath, weak bladder, runny eyes, highly contagious, jumbles speech, and some have been known to pass out.  Laughter if taken as prescribed can cure most illnesses.  However, if overdose should occur please spread it!!!

This is some of the dumb stuff people say and do (me included,,but I wont tell which one I did) *wink


1.While conversing on your cell phone;  “Aye, let me call you right back, I gotta find my cell phone so I can make this quick run”  Caller says, “Huh, well what you talking on?”

2. While talking with a friend; “Girl let me tell you the crazy stuff that went down the other night. You will not believe how things turned out”

Friend says, “Let me take off my glasses so I can hear this.  I don’t wanna miss anything”

You, “So taking off your glasses makes you hear better?”

Friend says, “What you mean by that?”

3. I need to clean this paper off.

Person…. Get’s up goes to sink, squeeze dish washing liquid on paper, runs water on paper, and begins to scrub the paper clean….

Me, “So what happens when you need to clean your mouth?”

4. While reading a magazine;  You, “Where are my glasses so  I can read these articles” Begin to do the chest pat down, look thru pockets, feel and pat the top of your head, pats down chest one last time.  Looks back at magazine and decide you will read the articles with or without the glasses; it seems pretty clear anyway. It finally dawns on you, you are wearing the glasses.

5. “Hey, I need $20 on pump 3.  Yes that car right there sir. Thank you, have a good night”.  Goes back to the car, starts engine and peels off.  One block later you realize you never got the gas….  

This is some of the things that made me laugh today.  One of them actually happened today.  I couldn’t do anything but laugh and say …. Are you for real??? LOL!!


You can add some things to the list that you or someone you know might have done that you think was just dumb… C’mon make me laugh some more… I’m trying to overdose so I can spread it….

Much Love,

Tracy B


Are you for real …Friday?

So what does today bring? I woke up trying to pray but each time I focused on it something or someone disturbed me.  I tried to get back on track, get focused,  finish praying but to no avail. Yet I am here sitting here blogging and thinking are you for real?????  That’s it..I will call this Are you for real Friday.   This name fits perfect due to the questions and circumstances of today.  Here’s an example…

Example 1

Walks up to counter and says to customer service representative, “Hey, good morning to you. I have a quick question for you.  Can you look at my account and provide status of why it’s this way?”

Customer service Rep says, “That’s not a quick question, fill out this form and wait for someone to call your name.  We gotta keep this line cleared so that folk with real quick questions can have them addressed!”

My response after closing my mouth..    “Are you for real lady?”

Example 2

Looked up checking account online and went through the deposits verses withdrawals…  My response to what I seen in front of my eyes…..”Are you for real?”

Example 3

Talked to my friend for a second and listened to him spew out all this useless information that was not relevant to our conversation…my response “Are you for real?”  Then it was more like wake me when you’re done talking irrelevancy!

OK>… I figured I’ve given enough examples for you to get an understanding of why Friday has the name it has.  I am not giving up on this day however.  I am expecting my night to go so well and so favorable  that the only  words left for me to say is …”God, are you for real?”  For what GOD gives is perfect and always on time!

If  your Friday started wrong praise GOD because the fun has just began! I’m excited to see how things will play out this evening….. I’m believing all things are working together for my good.-)

What is your Friday like or am I the ONLY one experiencing something so unbelievably crazy?

Thinking Thursday- Advice please

Now I was motivated Monday, tested Tuesday, wilding out on Wednesday so let’s see what today unfolds.

There are those days in life when you begin to wonder if the path you’re taking is a path at all. Not to sound defeated but to just be real with you.  Can I just talk to you?  It’s a thinking Thursday afternoon. That’s what I will call it *thinking Thursday*.   One of my thought’s this thinking Thursday…..

I wonder sometimes if this blog is my idea or if I truly heard from God.  Sounds double minded right? I know, but yet my actions are still writing this blog.  My mind is saying and thinking all sorts of things but my spirit is yet sitting here doing what I believe I should be.  With that being said I’m trying to find direction with the blog and I need some advice please…

I love to see people uplifted, encouraged, inspired, and laughing.  In other words from day-to-day I am unsure of what I will say. I don’t want to be listed as just a blogger for inspiration, or comedy; basically I don’t want a particular audience. I’m not trying to be just a particular genre..I wish to reach just one, thru millions, by all means.

Now that’s thinking outside the box…lol!

I don’t even know if you all find me interesting enough to comment but I do appreciate you taking time to read what I have to say.  Seriously, thank you!-) The blog is titled Speakingup4me but I’m constantly thinking about what I want to call it so that you all know it’s me everyday. Reality TV… Tracy style(lol) Now that’s a thought. Then I think…  Should I even give this such thought?

Key thing I learned in Business Management class is great leaders are often chosen for promotion based on how well they can follow. Key thing I learned in life is I follow great leaders based off direction.  You have to know where you’re going if you want me to follow.

I read and follow blogs.  I know the direction in which they are leading; thus the reason I follow! But me, I am all over the place…  How can I  pin point a particular phrase that says it all?  The umbrella that houses or says it all. I hope this makes sense to you

I wish to lead you on the journey of me.  Allow you to sneak peek some of my letters to God the Almighty.  Hear a couple of my confessions while laughing at a lot of my mistakes. Inspire you thru songs and poems that stems best in heartache.  Let you hear & read the excerpt of the new book of Stranjay’s Revenge on Love.  Encourage and uplift you thru Godly wisdom from above.  There are so many things I wish to say, do, blog, post… Please help me solve the mystery of this key phrase for all my followers….

For I only wish to reach just one, thru millions, by all means.  What do you think sounds good?

Much Love,

Tracy B

She said, then He said-What will you say?

What if I asked you something personal or intimate, would you reveal it to me?  What if I told you something personal first, would it make a difference in what you say to me?  What if we said things we both feel about each other at the same time, would that be easier for you to speak your mind?  What if I just walked away and forgot all about this, would you still act like we didn’t just share this moment?  What if I told you I had always had these feelings for you but afraid of the rejection I would face? Would you tell me that you have mutual feelings?  

What if all of this is just a dream and we’ve never met at all? I wonder when I wake if this dream would linger on? What if I couldn’t shake the thought of you and the way you seem to make me feel? Would I go on a quest and end up searching for the man of my dreams still? I wonder if found would we be the perfect match? Or would you stay away  to avoid us bonding in any type of way? Maybe I should just sit back and allow all of this to be.  For now it seems you don’t have much more to say to me….

I guess I’ll take your silence as the ultimate hint, that all my questions of what if’s is nothing more than gone with the wind.  The treatment I receive today will meet you on tomorrow.  What if you seen the karma coming, would you still sit in silence or finally say something?

I’ve had about enough already and will go about my way.  I guess today I found rejection in the worst possible way.  My own friend, someone who has never turned their back, but soon as I say love, commitment, joining, becoming one you can’t handle that?  Now this is just grand, royalty treatment I say, I can’t believe you’re just sitting there looking at me sideways…. Don’t place your hand over my mouth and try to silence me. What if I did you like  that, would you…..

BE QUIET AND ALLOW ME TO SPEAK…. he finally interjected after a short pause;  he continued to speak his mind with no further interruptions at all.

I’ve loved you forever, your smile, your eyes, your walk.  You even have me going hearing your voice over the telephone.  My world is alright when you walk into the room.  Your mere presence and heavenly glow causes onlookers to hypothetically assume. I hear the whispers, who is she, what if she’s  someone of whom we should take notice?  I politely chime in and tell them she’s the best of the best and my one and only!  Only friend that I wonder and have anxieties over, wondering if I’m worth you making a fuss over.

I suffered through the what if’s because  I never had the courage to say.  I wondered, what if I tell her all these years I’ve been building my castle of love, would she look at me strange?  What if I told her the castle was for two and she was the one I made my queen? Would she walk away like always and pretend I never said anything?  What if I decided that enough was enough and today was the day, would she feel the same?

Now you sit here and take the words from my mouth.  The love you just confessed is the love I’ve always dreamed about.  Let’s go ahead and make this commitment, this bond, the God ordained connection legal.  Next step is the church house, with friends, loved ones and the preacher.  You know what I mean, I’m saying I want to marry you…   Are you ok, you haven’t closed your mouth since I said these things?  Should I take your silence as a yes in all this revelation of the heart of things? What if I stop talking and let you intake it all…..

She finally speaks after a long silence and hot tears running rapidly from her eyes.  She placed her hand in his hands, looked deep into his beautiful eyes and happily said NO!

Women are never satisfied!!!


Much Love,

Tracy B

Testing Tuesday!

It’s Tuesday, though it’s not as chaotic as yesterday, it’s still as testing.  As a matter of fact that’s the best word to describe the things going on this day.  Let me explain mine and you can share your testing Tuesday with me -)

Seek peace and pursue it with all your might, for that leads to favor and long-lasting life!

This statement is so much easier read than actually walked out.  Maybe it’s just me, but I have found it often times to hold my peace let alone seek it.  I actually found it more worthy to speak my peace, how bout that!! LOL-  I found it very difficult at times to hold information I knew was damaging to someone who has crossed me  and that I didn’t really consider a friend.  I wanted to let them have a piece of my mind and some of this venom spewing from the well that never runs dry when I feel it’s time for war in verbal confrontation.. Surely, I can’t be the only one?  This tongue can be a weapon of mass destruction when someone attacks the very things you love.  None of us stand powerless in that situation 😉 I’ve said all of that to say the statement or declaration made earlier is much easier read than actually walked out.

I call today a day of testing due to the things my flesh and spirit battled over.  There use to be a time when I felt defeated, like I would just be this way forever.  Almost like a thorn in my side, a permanent scar and situation.  However, I dare you to change that thought to the opposite (Positive) and stay focused on that! I guarantee you will have a change of heart and mind as well.  Now there are those days when defeat tries to rear its ugly head and this is one of those days.  

It seems I have been in war ever since my feet touched the floor.  It  feels as if the heels of my feet are bruised.  I felt little bite marks and scratches while walking today but I didn’t stop walking.  So in my travel, still having the heels of my feet bruised and scared, I’m crushing the head of this thing that’s under me. Once today I stumbled and looked to the left just for a second, but God told me to look straight ahead.  It was only a glance, but the thought I had infuriated and charged heat to rush from my heels to my toes then flowing like hot larva up to my ankles this rage traveled and was determined to reach its destination of the mind.  I couldn’t believe how fast that negative energy was traveling.  I quickly changed my thought, look straight ahead, stomp a little, then I noticed it.  Each time I stomped  something was squashing under my feet, so I kept stomping and squashing.

God said, ” Say what you want to say. Get it out! I already know what you’re thinking.  It will make you feel so much better to speak your peace to me then to let loose and look foolish.  Go ahead, I’m listening.” 

Of course I went full-fledged with the thoughts running thru my mind.  I said everything I was thinking and I meant everything. I knew I could trust God with my most intimate details and he wont reveal anything.  This I know is factual, you should really find this out for yourself.  He is so worth the risk!!! Once again, I digressed, but this is a good one! OK

So as I finally took a breath from saying all my piece of mind, God spoke His peace.

“So what if all of that is going on, does it make any difference to you? After all don’t you say you don’t want this or that, so should anything that you don’t want matter so much?  Really, where are you with this? Do you even know? I do!!”

Once again, I had to digest the words of my Father God and seek the answers to all the questions asked of me.  In doing that I noticed I was seeking PEACE and pursuing it with all my might. I wanted to know why I was tripping off of the very things I say I despise.,, hmm really. I was stomped, and so I stomped again.  This time the little bite and scratches I felt earlier on the heels of my feet had almost diminished in power; I hardly felt anything.  For my spirit wishes to win each battle of the mind; but the flesh is at war.  However, because I’m seeking God (who is LOVE, peace, and soul*wink*) with all my might my spirit is being fed and has defeated  the flesh in this battle on this testing Tuesday.  

We fight battles daily.  It seems we’re always being attacked.  In some ways that is true, but our biggest attackers are within.  Fight the battle within your own lions.  Seek peace within, pursue it with all your might, for in doing so you will obtain favor with both God and man!

Today I choose to seek peace and pursue it with all my might.  I walk in favor as I do peace.


Much Love,

Tracy B

Keep It Moving!

Good morning and happy Monday! This is the start of the work week and the day so many working individuals dread.  For it’s on Monday mornings when all the chaos hits which brings me to the inspirational note today.

When you’re closet to your destination is when you have the greatest urge to stop!
Have you ever asked someone or used your GPS for directions? I’m sure the majority of us have and probably still doing it today.  You get the directions and the way you hear it or see it it’s only a few miles away, so you head out with great expectations of making it to your destination, taking care of whatever needs to be done, and getting back home.

You’re riding along the way and  notice time has elapsed and too much time at that.  You begin to think you should have made it by now; after all, it was only a few miles away.  You start to get upset with each passing minute because the drive seems to long and the  way you heard it and seen it, it was only to be a short trip there and back.  Just at that point you begin to experience what I call *emotional trauma within your personal space*.  Just like Monday mornings you set up anxieties within yourself.  We actually plan for Monday to be horrible and then when it is we say we knew it, like we can foresee the future (LOL) The  truth is, the reason it happened that way is because you spoke it into existence and created your environment.  Emotional  trauma within your personal space is all about thinking about what you’re thinking about; it starts mentally.  Once again I digressed.  OK!

So you’re driving and breaking down by the second. You think maybe you’ve gone too far, surely you have passed it by now. Then you stop being rational and start talking with authority to the GPS (pointing at it!) or calling the folk that gave your directions and before they can even talk you start spewing where you are, and how far you’ve driven, and gas cost too much to be getting lost, and this place or that event better be worth it for all of  this…etc… Or maybe that’s just me! I’ll take that because if there’s one thing I despise is being lost-ugh! Then after hanging up or throwing your GPS you decide you’ve had enough it’s time to  STOP and get directions again.

This time you’re not so excited and expecting the best. You’re more so frustrated and just ready to get there and get it over with already. The enthusiasm is a thing of the past.  However, you ask someone for directions and your mind is blown by the words from their mouth, “You’re almost there. Just keep going a few inches further and it will be on your right”.  You stand there looking down the road where the person is pointing and can see the sign peeking out.  Can you believe that.  It’s happened to me plenty of times and I laughed at myself each time right after smacking myself for stopping.  The sad part is sometimes I’ve turned around and forfeited the trip because I didn’t want to keep driving any further. I didn’t want to stop and ask for directions.  I’ll start down talking the trip saying it must not be worth me going since I’m lost. Then if I wanted to be spiritual and deep I’d be like maybe God don’t want me to go, this is a sign because I keep getting lost.  Then I’d get home and say where I turned around (gave up) at only to be informed I was but a few inches from my destination.  That’s when it hurts the  most.

Well destiny and purpose has a way of being closest when you’re feeling the strongest urge to stop.  I’m preaching to myself right now. If no one reads this blog today it’s alright because it reached 1 and that’s me. Thank you God for life changing words. For just 1 word from the Lord will remove all doubts, cause the sun to shine and give peace of mind; Speak Lord!  When you feel like you can’t go another step further, if one more thing happens, if another person close a door in my face, if another friend walks out, if my children do one more thing, if another bill come and no money behind it, if another man cheats, if another tragedy strikes, etc… you get the point.  You’re at your breaking point and feel you just have to stop and regroup for a moment. It’s okay to stop! Can you believe that?

God says “It is okay to stop! but; there’s always a but, it’s not okay to turn around and go back.  All these things have to happen. For when you seek me you knock and find my suffering yet for a little while. It is not a good suffering; for if it felt good you would not call it suffering, nor would you learn from the pain. You must endure like a joyful servant for when you have been molded and perfected as I see fit, I will sit you out on display for the world to view.  Your flaws and imperfections will be your greatest eyesore but it will be their fondest love for you. Don’t stop to stay here or turn around, you have to keep moving. Your land is yet a few inches away, you’re closer to your destiny and purpose, it’ll be on your right. For when you have suffered for a little while with LOVE then you can partake in ALL IT’S GLORY for eternity. Don’t fret the small stuff. You got this!!!!”

When you have the greatest urge to stop, STOP, take a breather and then keep it moving. You’re just a few inches away from your promise, coming up on your right!  (One on One with God (I Aint Scared!)- Lazy Cafe J’s Tracy Brewer *Coming Soon*)

Enjoy your Monday!-)

Much Love,

Tracy B

Is it worth it!

Dont let anyone steal your spirit!!!

There are times when we find ourselves at odds with someone.  It may seem that our only choices is to get caught up in the situation or walk away. The eagle tells us we must prove we are right.  If we walk away, the other person will win.  The eagle keeps us from recognizing there’s another choice.  Whatever situation confronts us, we must recognize our right to be at peace.  The need to be right and meet discord head on begins within.

It is a need that stems from the feeling of powerlessness, unworthiness, and lack of love.  It shows up in life as arguments and confrontation.  When we have peace in our hearts and minds, we drop peace into our lives.  When discord and disharmony presents themselves, we can stand firm.  When we let go of the need to improve ourselves,  nothing and no one can disturb the quiet and peace of our minds.


I am rightfully peaceful.

Ilyana Vanzant _ Acts of Faith